when you close your eyes and see all the beautiful things that you cant see with your eyes open,that darkness that that is not really dark anymore and is kinda soothing and comforting because it’s what your whole life feels like,so there is that amalgamation of a dream and a reality of what you want and what you have,in that damned darkness,you find solace,so your eyes stay shut too long that you start believing in it, you start believing that there isn’t hope for you in light,the light that looks like the darkest of darkness.a reality in which there is no hope for you,your share was somehow left out and you have no idea why.
when you’ve been told so many lies by the people you value or that one person you dedicated your whole life to and the truth finally comes to light, oh maybe that’s why you hate the light so much,maybe it’s because every evil and shadow,every pain and sorrow made in darkness is associated with light,so when that truth is out,you don’t want to believe it,so you live a dream,a shattered dream lost to true lies,a dream killed by the only thing tat was to give it value,the person or the people you sacrifice for everyday finally offer you as a sacrifice on the altar for the fulfillment of their more often,selfish desires and you wonder what light there is in life,the more reason why you believe in the power of darkness and trust its ability to give you peace,light failed you.
The race takes you round and round,to and fro,back and forth,then it hits you,life is too short and you have been happy for the shortest time,almost shorter than the entire lifetime. fortunately,you realize that no one is worth anything except you,no one gives you what you want except you and you feel so stupid for taking forever to realize that because it’s what everyone has been telling you,isn’t experience a painful lesson or was it the best teacher? There is some painful truth in that. you adopt indifference,not really insensitivity but just an act of not paying attention,not because you don’t care but because you don’t want to probably because you used up your energy and thoughts rebuilding your betrayed broken life and finding a new dream with which you are trying to create connection and using the rest of the energy on preventing yourself from going back to where you came from.It takes a lot of effort to put a past behind,sad or happy and find something new .The old route always feels right especially after traveling a million miles,overcoming all the barriers of that route just to find out it was not the right one,but you realize you have to start afresh,a new journey.
it is overly painful and you will feel sorry for yourself,regret your life and then what? the statement that always arises comes up again,MOVE ON!!!!
They call you heartless and inhuman,yet inhumanity started when they failed to pick your calls,it started when you had to cry the nights alone,it developed when they became too busy to calm your storms and it advanced when they let you drown as they watched but just when you learned to stand on your own two feet,they start walking back,one by one,wanting a share of your happiness,a happiness they fought so hard,the strenght they painfully extracted from your every muscle,a happiness whose origin they know nothing about. Everyone wants a share of a goo thing,its human,really?that’s inhuman,you are not inhuman for giving you what you deserve. Do they even know how long it took you to agree with that?they should have treated you right when they had a chance.Where were they when you couldn’t reach for a tissue to wipe your tears,where were they when you hugged your pillow so tight,it almost tore to pieces,where were they all those times you wanted a hand to hold?
life is very hard and if anyone is trying to make it harder for you, you have a right to make a choice that’s going to make it a little easier.
You learn to listen to the unspoken,hear the unsaid,do the undone and see beyond your pain.Let go of all the loose ends that you cant tie and hold on to the strings that keep you together.That is all the reasons why you go through sorrow,darkness,vaccum and hollow,just so that you learn your strenght and appreciate you for the little things no one ever noticed. So that even when you fail to be famous to the world,you know the battles you fought on your own and won,so that you know what a hero you are,your hero,so that you have the confidence to face life and do your things,handle your life.