when I heard this stories, not really stories but a word going round that an officer’s wife was coming back from Mombasa where she had gone to visit her sister.The husband who was supposed to go pick her declined and my in-law offered to do that because the woman had her child with her and Mombasa road would be hectic, so she was to alight along the way, I don’t know what stage and await her husband’s arrival which never happened. She got home anyway, thanks to my in-law’s generosity though the grand welcome was not there, she went straight to the kitchen to prepare supper when the man started asking questions about some rumors that were going round and the incident turned into an argument, then a fight in which case it was a one way fight because you see it was a man against a woman, the coward idiot picked up a piece of blunt metal and hit his woman hard, she started bleeding profusely and it got out of hand, seeing the damage, the man whose heart was I guess more blunt than the object he used just left, leaving the poor thing to die. Her kids screamed for help and the kind neighbours who were in turmoil ever since she got home responded real quick “look after my kid, we need to rush that woman to the hospital” my cousin says as she leaves, I had no much choice.
When I inquired later on, I was told that it was their lifestyle, rather her lifestyle, she gets punched, kicked, insulted and slapped. Mark you, the man never went to check on her until she got better and left the hospital, they did not report it further because of ‘his job’, don’t ask me why she is till with him, they give the silly excuse of kids.
This is just one of the many incidences. I know of a neighbor back home whose husband comes home at 3am to beat her hard and even send her out of the house at that wee hour of the night. She is still with him.
I can site more than twenty incidences and each time this recurs, my heart breaks. This woman thinks about her kids all day even when she is at work, rushes home from work to cook, wash, iron her husbands clothes, the one he will wear to work tomorrow, polish his shoes and still prepare herself for him, while the man just leaves work, picks a few friends and goes over to a joint to drink himself up like he got no worries in the world, then go home to complain that the food is this and that, his clothes are not well kept, damn you shameless thing!!!!!!!! Make use of your hands and do it properly then instead of rumbling, do men even know the names of their children?
Okay, my dear women, what is wrong with you? No forgive that question, what is wrong with the men in your lives?
I would love to trace the roots of these problems, my friend once asked me, “Have you seen these men with beautiful wives and the cutest kids you can ever dream of yet he is cheating with a woman uglier than the ugliest creation?” I laughed, and then said “yes”
You will confirm that these things happen and I know women do play their part in doing things wrong but what is the so-called head of the house doing to make things right? As far as I know, most of them sail even further in the wrong direction. So who will make things right when the head is insane?
These discussions arise every now and then and another friend of mine has settled for single-parenting. What’s the need of you women insisting on staying in a marriage for the sake of the kids when he is an absentee dad? What’s the need when the moment those kids hear the sound of their dad kilometers away, they wish for the earth to open up and swallow them, they run up and down the house looking for something to do of which there is none because they know the moment this man steps into that house, everything looks wrong, then why shouldn’t he take his time to show them how he would love things to be done, his preferred way. Why would you take the blame when the kids fail and they will be “your stupid son”? Apparently, every man and his lineage are bright, superstars, even the man who dropped out of school and somehow managed to find himself a wife. Why wouldn’t all the superstars we have around take a few minutes of their alcoholic, womanizing and rumbling lives to share a piece of their stardom with the stupid people they brought into this world?
Woman, we can’t live like this forever. I know we have softer hearts but use your brains a little more, you deserve to be happy, so don’t strive hard to keep happy, a man who is doing all he can to stay happy, even if this means hurting you. Consider someone who considers you and don’t try more than you should. Life is short, you are lengthening his and shortening yours. I need to see the glitter in your eyes, the fulfillment at the end of the day, not depression and always asking what more you need to do, there is nothing more you need to do. If that robot of a man you have in your life thinks what you are doing is not enough, he will suit himself. He can as well go ahead and do it himself, after all, they are the ones who claim to be strong and know-it-all.