LESSONS FROM BREAKUPS

If you don’t win, then make a point of learning lessons.
1. Do not call anyone a boyfriend, call him a future ex.This is because,with the current trend,chances of your parting ways are high,plus it will only be an added advantage if the relationship works out.We have all been blaming each other, no one wants to accept they’re at fault,so all women remain angels and all men remain men of God.

2. Do not trust him
whether he treats you like a queen or like a queen’s servant, keep trust out of the picture,unless of course we’re referring to the current definition of trust because the original has lost meaning.

3. Have fun
go out with as many men as possible,as many as all that ask you out and do not consider that as cheating. You only have a few drinks,eat,shop and at the end of the day,give him a quick light hug and walk away.Do not allow him to hold your waist or hand,that is inappropriate for anyone in a relationship.

4. Ask for Money
This should happen each time he takes you out.He should pay you for your time and for your generosity to have him in your schedule.

5. Do not question anything he does.This will go a long way in saving your self anything that looks like disappointment. Chances are high that he will lie about it. so when he says he will work late,or is out with his boys,tell him it’s okay and when you hang up,please add “who cares”

6.Do not think so highly of him.Refrain from talking too much about him especially if it’s positive.I assure you,you won’t be saying the same things about him in two months and you will look a fool talking about his shortcomings before the sweetness of what you said about him earlier fades off your tongue.

7. Do not believe him completely so that each time he says he’s at his mum’s place who he apparently calls “my girlfriend” you pretend to believe him because you might later find out she is actually a girlfriend who he decides to turn into his mama each time he talks to you.

8. Do not love him deeply.Always love yourself a little more so that when it finally ends, you have yourself to love even in his absence.

9.Act like you care but train yourself not to give a damn.When he tells you how he’s having a tough time at work that it’s even eating into his weekend,which is by the way,a polite way of telling you that you can’t go out as planned, you act sad but smile deep down because dude two will take you on that road trip you’ve been wanting.The monotony of the boredom of the city restaurants  that he has been taking you to all year gets a break.

10.Act jealous but do not be really jealous.ati he keeps telling you about some chile at his place of work or about a colleague he had lunch with,you will be shocked to find out you’ve had a co-wife all along while you were busy being jealous na tutaona utafanya nini.

11.Tell him you love him but tell yourself you don’t love him.This will protect you from appearing like you dating an onion,preserve your tears for the kitchen moments.Preserve your love for family, friends,chocolate and coffee.
All I am saying is,avoid anything that will lead in the direction of heartbreak and pain.

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